Connection, not punishment, transforms behaviour of children in care, study finds

A long-term study by Lithuanian and Estonian researchers has found that stable relationships and a supportive environment—not disciplinary measures—are key to improving the social skills of children in state care, LRT reports.

Many children entering care lack basic social abilities, such as conflict resolution or trust in adults, often due to early trauma or neglect in their biological families, according to the research led by Mykolas Romeris University. In Lithuania, 1.3% of children grow up in non-biological families or permanent care, frequently carrying deep-seated distrust of adults.

Rather than reflecting “bad behaviour,” impulsivity, withdrawal, or aggression in these children often signal unmet emotional needs and missed opportunities to learn healthier ways of interacting, the study found.

The international team, including professors Vida Gudžinskienė, Rita Raudeliūnaitė, Justinas Sadauskas, Dovilė Lisauskienė, and Mare Leino from Tallinn University, analysed social workers’ experiences across Lithuanian regions. Their findings highlight a critical shift: a child’s behaviour is shaped more by their current relationships and surroundings than by past trauma alone.

“Like building a house without foundations”
Researchers observed that many children arrive in care without fundamental social skills—unable to start conversations, respond to feedback, or resolve simple disputes. “It’s like building a house without foundations,” one specialist noted, describing how basic communication must be taught from scratch.

These gaps stem from early environments where conflict was managed through shouting, silence, or instability. Children replicate these patterns, complicating their relationships in schools or care homes and reinforcing cycles of withdrawal or impulsive reactions.

What truly changes the outcome
The study reveals that social skills can develop successfully when children enter stable, nurturing environments. Smaller, family-like care settings—such as group homes or foster families—proved particularly effective. In these contexts, consistent adult relationships and individual attention help children experience the security they previously lacked.

Social workers reported transformative shifts: children who initially avoided eye contact or reacted aggressively later began asking questions, sharing, and forming bonds. Peer relationships, such as “sisterhood” or “brotherhood” in foster families, also provided critical emotional support, filling voids left by absent biological families.

Daily interactions in these settings create a supportive framework that strengthens social skills over time, the researchers concluded.